At about ten in the night everyday, the power went off for about five minutes. Far from city and vehicle lights, the sky suddenly lit up with billions of stars. During the long weekends when my friends and neighbours were away, I would gaze upon the skies in solitude and absolute silence. For those three hundred seconds, you forget everything.

You forgot CA. You forgot CN.
You forgot education. You forgot jobs.
You forgot achievement. You forgot disappointment.
You forgot dreams. You forgot ambition.

You forgot family. You forgot sibling.
You forgot enemy. You forgot friend.
You forgot laughter. You forgot weeping.
You forgot language. You forgot music.

You forgot history. You forgot philosophy.
You forgot learning. You forgot teaching.
You forgot birth. You forgot death.
You forgot the known. You forgot the unknown.

You forgot yourself.

Then the tube lights flickered and the ceiling fans whirred and you had a life to live.

* CA and CN stand for Computer Architecture and Computer Networks, two of the many subjects that I used to be engaged in when the power went off.

“I don’t want to live.”
“Loser!”
And so, I lived.

“I don’t want to do primary.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did primary school.

“I don’t want to do middle.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did middle school.

“I don’t want to do high.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did high school.

“I don’t want to do college.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did college.

“I don’t want to work.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did work.

“I don’t wan’t to do university.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did university.

“I don’t want to do a Ph.D.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did Ph.D.

“I don’t want to do my Post Doc”
“Loser!”
And so, I did Post Doc.

“I don’t want to do research”
“Loser!”
And so, I did research.

“I don’t want to be famous.”
“Loser!”
And so, I did fame.

“I don’t want to live.”
“Loser! You have already done it.”

What did I gain from proving them wrong?

10:00 AM

“Hey, I want you to make lemonade for our customer.”

“OK. Send the requirements across.”

12:00 PM

“How is it coming?”

“I have done a study of lemonades. Called up my grandmother for a few as well. I am now looking into which would suit our customer best.”

02:00 PM

“Well?”

“I have narrowed down to four flavours now. I am doing a taste test now with people in the wing. Did you take part? By the way, did you know Monsanto is trying to create a GM variety of lemon. I wonder what they are trying to do. Poke a hole, squeeze and drink straight from the fruit?”

/* laughter */

04:00 PM

“I have finally selected one. Take a shot.”

/* tastes */ “This tastes great. Good job. We will serve this to the customer. I will prepare the process documents right away.”

04:30 PM

“I am done with the documents. Take a look.”

/* reads through the document */ “Looks fine.”

/* clicks send */ “Done. Good job. See you tomorrow.”

“OK. I will spend some time at the library and some TT before leaving for the day.”

Big Brand MNC Software Services Company 2008

10:00 AM

“Hey, I want you to make lemonade.”

“OK”

“I will send the requirements across. Take a look at it and get back to me.”

10:30 AM

“What’s up?”

“I am sorry. I am not sure what ‘lemonade’ is.”

/*thud*/ “Did you check the dictionary?”

/* Silly smile */

“Lemonade is what we call ‘lime juice’.” /* smiling sarcastically */ “I hope you know what that is.”

“Yes. Yes.”

12:00 PM

“How is it coming?”

/* sheepish smile again */ “It is coming fine.” /* Seeing that the manager can see through the lie */ “I had to go out for some time. We are starting Nose pickers Anonymous on campus and I am part of the organizing committee. I had to go for that. I will sit through lunch.”

“There is no need to skip lunch.”

“No. I insist. I am not hungry as I had something at the meet.”

1:00 PM

/* Manager walks by */

“I just got back. I couldn’t bear the hunger.”

1:15 PM

“Could you give me some initial pointers?”

“For making lemonade?”

“You see, I have never made lemonade in my life. So, I am not really sure on how it is done.”

/* sigh */ “Try searching on the internet.”

“What keywords should I use?”

“‘Lemonade’ would be just fine. ‘Lemonade Recipes’ would probably give you more results. It will be great if we could have three or four flavours and then narrow down on the most appropriate for our customer.”

“OK. I will get back.”

1:45 PM

“Firefox keeps crashing.”

“Did you try disabling the extensions?”

“No. How do you do that?”

/* knows how to do it but not in a mood to answer */ “Is Firefox the only browser on your computer? What did you do to Internet Explorer?”

“Ah! I forgot about that. I have been using Firefox for a long time now.”

3:00 PM

“What’s up?”

“I have found one recipe.”

/* takes a glance at his system clock */ “OK. Start using that.”

“Recipe says that I need a squeezer.”

“I think you should raise a request for that.” /* thinks about the “good old days” */

“OK.”

3:30 PM

“I need approval for the squeezer from you and also the Tools Group.”

“OK”

3:45 PM

“Tools Group wants a form to be filled. I am not sure what goes into it.”

“Send it across. I will fill it up.”

“OK.”

5:00 PM

/* squeezer is delivered to the desk */

“What are you doing?”

“I am searching on the internet for instructions on how to use the squeezer.”

/* thuds again */ “Let me show you. Get me that squeezer.” /* thinks to himself “Why didn’t I even assign this? I could have done it myself. But if I do that, he might never learn.” */ /* quietly demonstrates the use of the squeezer */ “Got it?”

“Yes.”

6:00 PM

“I have made the lemonade. Can I leave for the day?”

“Let me taste it. Get me a bit.” /* is handed a small bit */ “I think there is too much sugar in this. Don’t you think so?”

“I am not sure. I thought it was all right”

“Did you get others to taste it?”

“No.”

“Hmm… There is too much sugar in it. We need to fix it. Dilute it.”

/* adds water */

“That would be enough. Let me taste it. Taste fine. Hey, can you taste this for me?” /* hands a bit to others in the cube */ “Taste fine right? OK. We will send this across to the customer.”

“OK.”

/* His eye catches the water bottle */ “Is that the water that we used for this?”

“Yes.”

“Oh No! The requirements specially called for Sierra Springs! Did you not read the requirements document?” /* starts cursing himself */

“Oh! Did it?”

“We will have to start again now.” /* the cursing becomes stronger */

9:00 PM

“How is it coming?”

“I think it is done. Can you do one final taste check?”

/* tastes */ “This tastes fine. Too bad that there isn’t anyone here to concur. Anyway, it is getting late. Let us dispatch it. I will prepare the process documents.”

10:00 PM

“Is the dispatch done?”

“Yes.”

“Should I check it?”

“If you would like too…”

“OK. I have sent the process documents. I hope I don’t miss the cab. See ya then.”

“I will leave after some TT for the day.”

Author’s Note: This was inspired by a conversation that he had with a senior project manager yesterday.

It all started when… Wait! It think it is quite irrelevant on how it all started. Those two pairs of hands belong to my friend Susam and me. They wrap around a glass of badam milk, the last glass of badam milk at the eatery and probably one of the best glasses of badam milk both of us ever had in our lives. Now for those of you who are not from the Indian subcontinent (and of course, do not want to leave this page to google it out), badam is nothing but “almond” and badam milk is a tasty concoction made from,  almonds, spices and milk!

As I said, it is irrelevant on how we got to this point. Neither is it relevant that one of us had already gulped down a glass and was laying claim to the other one’s. The only relevant thing is that, at some point today, there was a glass of badam milk, tasty badam milk, which both of us wanted. Neither of us wanted to let go of the glass and both of us were determined. As the minutes ticked by, one of us tried getting a straw. It did not work. A bit of jostling spilled a bit of the milk onto the table. After a few minutes, the milk starting dripping onto our clothes and on to the floor.

Much to the bewilderment and amusement of other customers and the workers in the eatery, we were engaged in a lively war of words as well. Initially, the management was passive. Probably, they were flattered too. After all, we were fighting over their badam milk! Nothing could be a better endorsement of their offerings. One of the workers took out his phone to click a couple of pictures. Were we going to make it to one of their advertisements?

We wondered how long it would be before a crowd gathered to watch the fight. Would people start placing bets on how it would turn out? Would NDTV beat the police to get there? Would a whack on our knuckles makes us let go of the glass? Or would we be still holding the glass as we spent a couple of hours or even a night in the cooler? Maybe, we might even get dragged to court! Wouldn’t it be cool if you said to the judge in Will Hunting style, “My Lord, Liberty is the soul’s right to have badam milk”!?

As the minutes ticked by, there was a fine mess on the floor. The manager tried intervening and chided us for dirtying the place. That did not work out. In response, we just kept asking each other to let go. Frustrated, he walked away. As lunch customers got fewer, some of the staff gathered around to watch.

After what seemed like hours, but was actually between thirty to forty five minutes, one of us let go. The manager refused our offer to clean up the place. Probably, he was happy for our endorsement or… whatever!

Letting Go

As we walked to Silk Board from Ladoos, we talked about how difficult or easy letting go is. With respect to our fight, and keeping the other issues such a fairness out (which is also entirely subjective), a spectrum would be from people who would never want a fight in the first place even if they are right to people who wouldn’t mind sinking the entire ship even if they are wrong. And we have people on every point on this spectrum. Something that is trivial to one person is so important to another person that they would give their life for it. Some give up too early and some don’t give up, even to the point of insanity or death. What determines a person’s stand on the spectrum?

Susam told me about Dr. Subhash Mukhopadhyay, a mutual friend’s (who is also my colleague at work)  uncle. A pioneer of IVF in India, he took his own life unable to bear the insults and reprimands instead of recognition. As he talked about the film “Ek Doctor Ki Maut” (Death of a Doctor), a film inspired by the life of Dr. Subash, I was also reminded about Maximillian Cohen, the protagonist of the film “Pi“.

Letting go.. For what should we let go? For what shouldn’t we? When should we let go? As usual, the question are easy. Only if the answers were too.

I think it was Tamil. I remember using Malayalam to communicate with my grandmother from Kerala, for she knew no other language, but other than that it was mostly Tamil at home, school and church. Of course, the school used English as a medium of education, as advertised. But like most other schools in this country, English was used as a language to test rather than to think and articulate.

In most primary schools across this country, teachers impart knowledge in English to students whose only exposure to the language would be at school. Everyday, the child crosses over in to an alien world where the language that he uses for thinking would not be the language used for education. Teachers are expected to mark the completion of each lesson or topic in the syllabus by handing out questions and answers.

And unlike at the church, where the kids immediately articulated their received their knowledge and answered my questions using their own words and framing sentences in whichever language they thought was best, children at school are expected to learn the answers by rote and produce them verbatim during the examinations. This system seems to have evolved from a need to help students whose first language is not the medium of instruction. As these children move into middle and high school, understanding, thinking and articulating becomes a tedious two step process. For example, in an examination, a question would be translated in to the native tongue, an answer would be formulated in the same tongue and then translated back into the medium of instruction.

Worse, in some schools the practice of handing out questions and answers continues well into high school and for some students, education turns out into a simple mix of pattern recognition and efficient rote learning algorithms. Some students are lucky to escape, either due to circumstances or by enlightened parents. But for the vast majority, this continues to be the sorry state.

In the middle of my third term of my second standard, my family moved to Bangalore. Bangalore was a whole new ball game. It was a cosmopolitan culture at school and in my neighbourhood, where I had no choice but to communicate in English. Sensing the need to improve my English, my mother brought in some changes in the way we (my brother and I) communicated at home. We decide to communicate with my mother in English while it is was decided that we would stick to Tamil for communication with my Dad. Communication between my brother and me was done in English.

This proved to be a turning point for me. Tamil took a back seat while English started to rule the roost in my life. Slowly, English became the medium of my thought and articulation. Today, I think in English and I write and speak better in English than any other language that I know – Tamil, Hindi or Malayalam. The fate was further sealed when I moved to Kerala for my high school and higher secondary where I was again in an environment where I could use nothing but English for communication. In addition, I started loving the language, thanks to the English curriculum of ICSE and ISC.

Coming back to the present, I visited my nephew last Saturday. He is my favourite nephew and he is very smart. He had turned four recently and his parents, my cousin and my brother in law, decided to put him in school. Being good parents and wanting the best for their kid, they sent him to a good “English medium” school. That should have made me happy. But sadly, I was not!

My nephew is now growing up in an environment where there is little chance of exposure to English other than at school. Both his parents speak Tamil at home and were educated in the Tamil medium. They have very little or no knowledge of the English language. The people around him are culturally homogeneous, which means that child would also communicate in Tamil with others around him. My brother in law is deeply religious and attends a church, a Tamil one. So, my nephew would learn to think and articulate in his native tongue, while being forced to learn in an alien language at school.

Being in such a circumstance, definitely hinders a child’s learning, imagination and exploring capacity. The child would be hindered by his inability to answer a question naturally using his own words but would have to rely on the answers provided by the teachers. This would encourage rote learning and prove a strong barrier to creative and original thinking and reasoning.

India’s economy seems to be powered by English. The ads on television and the print media offer a thousand ways for people to master the English language. A person who failed it to make it to college earns twice or thrice of the pure science or mathematics graduate purely on the basis that he is able to manage to call up someone in Atlanta and offer them a phone package using a fake accent. With the boom of the IT and ITES industries, and the glitter of cars and houses, people in this country have strongly come to believe that English is the miracle that this country was waiting for and the pill for all troubles.

And we sometimes take pride in the fact that our love affair with the English language would somehow help us in our race with our northern neighbours. Sometimes our comparisons even dare to bring in advanced economies where English is not the primary language. But, we forget to ask the most important question: What is the kind of prosperity has English brought us? Would we be continue to be the cheap back office for the world while we destroy creativity and imagination in our children? How long can this be sustained? Can the future bear the rape of an entire generation?

My friends in the scientific research community would now make a mention that most research in this world is produced and shared in English. That is absolutely right. But, what about the Germans, the Japanese and the Russians? These folks continue to maintain their scientific and technology lead in spite of their primary and middle school education being in their native tongue. And I feel that it is highly important that a child thinks and articulates in the language that he or she is most comfortable in. Maybe English can continue to serve as a second language until the child is ready to master any language.

This blog is not a rant against English. The laptop on which I type this blog shares its space on the table with four great tragedies of Shakespeare. I am one of the moderators of the “Towards Better English” community at my work place. I continually strive to improve my use of my first language, as English has now become, and I love this language. While I would like to see the language being used by many people, I would also to see it not thrust upon hapless kids.This post is about choices.

How are parents going to deal with this issue? Are parents going to change and bring in a significant level of English at homes and social circles or are they going to change the schools of their children if the former is not possible? And what would be the solution to provide a knowledge of the English language at a latter stage in life, if the latter is done?

Some of us are least bothered. We never had a passion in life and we never cared. And some of us did have a passion, an yearning to do something that we truly loved. And we now live in denial, telling ourselves that it is fate and that we need to stick to what destiny has planned for us. We tell ourselves that our parents have a standing in society and that it needs to be preserved. The pressure of our peers and the mockery our relatives, didn’t we have enough?

My story today revolves around two people, whose names I do not wish to reveal.  One of them is about to finish his first year MBBS at CMC, while the other just joined as a fresher for the same program this year. They are 23. Yes, they are as old as me. And I just completed two years in the corporate world! Do you know how difficult is to find yourself in the company of people who are disconnected from you emotionally by age? Do you know how difficult it is to get ordered around or even ragged when you are an adult? Well, at least it is not as hard as finding out that you should have done something else in your life when you are old and have a grandchild on your lap!

So, what did you want to be? A physicist? An economist? An architect? A doctor? A dentist? A writer? – the deep earning of a soul back then but bad memories that bring a sigh now. Why should it be that way? Why can’t we change it?

All we have is one life and I think it does not make sense to live it for others unless you are absolutely sure that you want to do it that way. Run to your first love.

During lunch, a friend told me about another who had a deep passion to become an architect but took up electronics and then went on take up a position in the software services industry. She still retains her passion for architecture but quite unfortunately post graduate courses in architecture require a undergraduate degree in architecture or at least in civil engineering. I wrote this post when I came back from lunch.

I know what an Higg’s particle is. I have done some elementary reading on it. I have watched Brian Cox’s presentation on the LHC at TED. I have read the SCIAM article “The Coming Revolutions in Particle Physics”. I know enough about the Higg’s particle to sound learned and impressive at the lunch table. Maybe even to the extent of being able to regurgitate a bit at a barcamp.

But will it be ever the same as getting down to the bowels of quantum mechanics and arriving at the particle mathematically? Will it ever equal at arriving at the big equation of everything and finding that you will have to introduce the big ‘H’ to make it work? Sometime this year, I got a piece of good advice: “Don’t be a quizzer”. Being a avid quizzer myself, I know exactly what the person was talking about. Quizzers know a lot of stuff – history, geography, economics, current affairs, arts, the sciences – and most of it is superficial, or should I say “partial”.

I am not a quantum physicist or even a physicist. Maybe I need not know more than what I know currently about the Higg’s particle. Neither does a zoologist need to know about “the pre-revolutionary utopia and the capital-forming effects of military mobilization” nor does a historian need to know about “advanced Fourier series” or “organic chemistry”. But in this day and age of Wikipedia and Google, does a “zoologist” even need to know his Chordata from his Annelida?

Being a polymath is different from being continuous partial. A polymath has in-depth knowledge of more than one field. A “continuous partial” has superficial knowledge in one too many fields. It is also a different matter to try out one’s hand at different fields to fall in love and become an expert in one of them. A “continuous partial” does not fall in love but rather continues to acquire partial knowledge throughout his lifetime. The entire idea is beautifully summed up in the statement by Richard Feynman which appears at the beginning of this blog.

So, is being “continuous partial” when it comes to knowledge, good or bad? The jury is still out on this one!

Useless Solutions
Some time last year, I was asked by a manger about various content management systems. I asked him about the purpose and he replied that they would use the CMS for interaction and knowledge sharing between technology experts in their unit. It did not make sense to have a separate silo of knowledge when such experts could be spread across different units. It made sense to share the expertise across the organization. Though he did not explicitly state the reasons to me, from the conversation that I had with him, I could figure out the reasons on why he was not so comfortable with the idea.

1. When you set up a separate system, your name gets attached to it. So, for the next appraisal cycle, you get a few points for that. Never mind if the “solution” that you developed, already exists or is not suitable or is not a sustainable model. The target is to get to the next level of the appraisal.

2. In creating independent silos, the unit name gets attached to it. Quite unfortunately, the company wiki (which runs on MediaWiki) does not have a system to pull up statistics based on unit. Managers would be happy to brag about statistics on their unit’s contribution to an initiative.

Some times it might be wiser to attempt a solution at a unit-level before taking it to the level of the organization. However, it does not make sense re-inventing the wheel.

3. Visibility. Someone becomes “famous”!

Creating such independent silos of information does not serve any purpose except for some ego-boost. From the perspective of the organization, it would be a complete waste of time. To conclude the original story, I think they ended up deploying MOSS. I was moved out of the building and never got to know on what happened to the project.

Kill Them
They are called fire-fighters. I know well about them as I was one too. If everything in the project is going wrong, just call the fire-fighter! He/She will come down from heaven, spend day and night looking at your problems and will work their brains off to get the code out to the customer on time. At the end, everybody is happy. The customer is happy. More than that managers are happy – the project was saved and nobody got screwed! And of course, the fire-fighter walks off with an award.

Fire-fighters are the prime reason for continuing incompetency. When something goes wrong, the folks in charge must take the fall for it. Instead, we have these fire-fighters come in and save the day and everybody seems to escape without a scratch. So, nobody pays the price and the cycle of torture and incompetency repeats over and over again. Thejesh said that every project needs a hero. I say, kill them!

“The importance of knowledgeable workers is brought out in a story by the science fiction writer Isaac Asimov set, as usual with him, in the far-off future. In that future era, youth were not educated painstakingly over years of schooling but instantaneously by the Knowledge Machine. After each individual reached the age of majority, the Knowledge Machine scanned the brain and imparted the most appropriate expertise to match individual capability.

“In its essentials, the story is about an adventurous boy, a son of a lowly carpenter. His ambition was like that of any other bright youth on Earth in those days – to migrate to the most affluent planet in the universe next to the star our astrologers call maha nakshtram. The boy was mad about computers. He clandestinely studied all that he could catch hold of about computers even before the Knowledge Machine had been applied to him. Thus, when his turn came with the machine, it found his brain to be not pure but full of unauthorised knowledge. The boy was rejected and sent to a mental asylum.

“Ultimately, after a series of disheartening episodes, an elderly professor rescues him and he is allowed to work his fill on computers if only he promises never to leave Earth. Having no choice the boy agrees.

“Then, the matter was explained to him: He had an A+++ brain with motivation to match. His abilities were so valuable that the Earth authorities could not allow it to be lost to others. He was sent to the asylum and put through excruciating experiences only to induce him to be loyal to Earth. When his loyalty was assured he was made a highly privileged scientist.

“In this imaginary story, three points are worth noting. One, the wise men of Earth would not allow its best brains to migrate. Two, Earth’s concern was for scientific/technological talent. Three, the brilliant talent came from humble background. In our country, we do the exact opposite. One, we are proud, rather than bothered, when our best brains migrate. Two, both in the public and in the private sector, innovative scientists are second class employees. Three, (as the current controversy about “creamy layer” indicates) chances are for few children from poor backgrounds to rise to the top. Should we be surprised if we find foreign capital is a threat and not an opportunity?”

When the cold war was over, a lot of people had this question: OK. We have beaten the Soviets to the moon. Why should we still keep spending so much money on space travel?

Space Research has affected our lives on earth so much. Check out this link. And you would be amazed in the number of ways it does. And robots and rovers can never replace humans (atleast for now).

When Vikram Sarabhai envisioned our own space program, he did it with the betterment of people in mind. In the latest issue of SCIAM-India, there is an interview of Prof. Jurgen Mlynek, President of the Helmholtz Association in Germany.

Q: “Almost all space powers – China, Japan, India, the USA – are working on moon projects. Why is Germany not doing it?”

A: “Well, I think it is a question of priorities. If resources are limited, you have to make a choice. Either you use unmanned satellite technology and robotics or you go for manned missions. But at the end you have to answer the question – what are we going for and what kind of technologies do we want to develop. With China, I get a feeling that manned space missions are also a question of prestige. While visiting the Indian space agency in Bangalore, I had the feeling that your pro gramme is focused toward the needs of your own people and you are interested in education, water, the growth of corn and the prediction of droughts. The Indian space mission is very much about the needs of your country and of your massive population.”

The higher we raise the bar, the benefits that we reap for life on earth are greater. That is why I personally feel that we should aim higher. I hope that in my lifetime, a man is put on Mars, a permanent human presence is established on the moon, India’s builds a module for the ISS and India contributes actively towards all international space projects.